The Internet, Logging and Fitness...

Apparently the day my modem died, Alden decided to stop in and pay me a visit. Thank you for your comments, sir. I am definitely going to live this chapter of my life to its fullest

But the fact that he stopped by last week is actually very funny... because the week he stops by, I am having a bad week fitness-wise. It's strange really how tied my fitness activity is to the internet. I have only been on SparkPeople 6 weeks but already I can now see how logging my daily food intake and exercise has made a change in my life. Without being able to log it on the internet, I stopped logging altogether and ouch! did that hurt!! The food wasn't so bad... although my water consumption, which wasn't great to begin with really tanked. As for exercise, yeah... well, that wasn't so great as well. My strength exercises completely fell by the wayside... and I can definitely notice. I really feel "fluffy" in areas where I was beginning to feel some firmness... abs... butt... arms. As for cardio, I did some but not like I had been doing. And that I definitely felt in my energy level.

Now I am not trying to make excuses but last week was a bit rough for me personally as well only because I was finishing my two week notice out and starting a new job. I wasn't doing regular hours at the new place however it cut into my sleep time which really did not help me out in the evening hours plus it stole away the time that I would normally get some exercise (especially my bike rides).

So as of yesterday I am back to logging (yes, Alden, you were right... Logging definitely makes a difference!) I got my strength exercises in... my abs are thanking me. And I did some cardio on a stationary bike and an elliptical machine. Did I happen to mention that my new job is located in a building that has a fitness center in it? Very cool! A group of the ladies go down during lunch and get a 20-30 minute workout in. I think this will really be beneficial during the winter months for me as well.

So while I had a slow week, I did still manage to lose some pounds(yeah!) but the inches stayed the same and in fact, grew on my hips and waist (ouch!). I definitely need to keep logging and should - GOD FORBID! - ever have another internet crisis, make sure I come up with a back-up plan for logging. May even have to do it the old fashioned way... with a pen and paper.

Commitment...

There are only two options regarding commitment. You're either IN or you're OUT. There's no such thing as life in-between.
- Pat Riley, basketball coach

So when it comes to getting more fit... am I in or out? I thought I was in... I really did. Even when I got sidetracked and lost my focus, I still thought I was in but looking back I know that I wasn't. At the time I really believed that I wanted to be in the game but just couldn't find the motivation, but then how could I really be in the game then? I think deep down, I just got tired... I was upset that I wasn't seeing results... although I know I wasn't putting my all into it. How could I expect to see results?

Right now, I feel like I am more in the game than ever before. I am not going gang busters on the BR... But I now have a plan in mind... M, W, F are my BR days... these are the days that I need to do 3 - 15 min workouts. On Sun, Tues, Thurs, I need to do some sort of strength exercises and try to fit in some cardio workout, like walking, biking or BR cardio, plus these are the days to add an extra abs if I feel like it. Before I was trying to BR 5X/week. And while some weeks I did it, others I fell short... and when that happened then I was down on myself and felt like a failure. I think this plan will work out much better for me. I love doing my BR but I started to get bored with it. I think by doing this plan I should be able to avoid the boredome since I have a little more choice in what I do plus, it allows me Saturdays off. But so far I have put a bike ride or a walk on those days anyway.

So it's only been two weeks but I feel great! I am back to logging my food intake... becoming more aware of calorie count (my SP plan says I should be eating between 1400-1800 calories/day... for the most part it has been pretty close to the 1400 mark). I am getting some sort of exercise every day. I am reading nutrition articles to make myself more aware and more informed. This time I think that I am really committed.

Rev Report...

Alden posted his Rev Report today on the BB... I finally had something to say. For too long, I have been struggling trying to figure out what it is going to take for me to get moving in the right direction. I started off so good... lost 30 lbs in 3 months. Then I had a bad spell for parts of December and most of January... finally got my butt back into gear towards the end of January and worked at it... but the weight wasn't coming off like it was earlier. I worked and worked and still nothing... I got frustrated... lost focus and quit working so hard. Then I really hit a downer period in March where I was trying to work out and my brain wasn't co-operating. I got some good advice from some and tried to work at what I liked, namely Abs and walks. That was doing just enough to keep me from falling any further behind. But I certainly wasn't going to see results doing that. But I told myself that was okay...

When I started this yes, I wanted to lose weight and I wanted to become healthier and extend my life... I wanted to be able to play with my kids without getting winded... I wanted to live to see my grandchildren. But when I started exercising along with the weight loss, I also noticed that I had more energy, I felt strong and I was walking taller, straighter... When I stopped exercising, I lost all that. At one time I even had muscles in my butt!!! Who'd a thunk it??? But I lost that.

Getting sick last week reminded me of all that I lost when I stopped exercising... I kept telling myself before that I wasn't in it just to lose weight but I think I was lying to myself. If that wasn't the case, then why was it so easy to just stop and give up? I lost sight of everything else that I was gaining by exercising. I lost that feeling of muscles... I lost that energy... I lost that posture I was acquiring... and I was losing ground in the weight loss by putting some of it back on. When I got so sick, I found myself wondering if I would've been that bad had I been exercising throughout... maybe... maybe not... By getting sick, I was given a reprieve... my weight dropped back to my lowest point. I could start again... pick it all back up... wipe the slate clean and begin again. But first I had to answer some questions...

What was I fighting for this time? Was it just to lose weight? Because what was going to happen if I hit a plateau again or worse yet.. if I failed to go any lower than where I currently was... Was I going to give up again? In order to succeed this time, I need to make sure that it is about more than just watching the numbers lower. What about the 30 lbs that I already lost? Aren't those pounds worth fighting for? What if I never lose another pound? Thirty pounds is still something to celebrate... that is three 10 lb bags of potatoes that I am no longer carrying around... do I really want to add that to my load again? NO!

What about that energy level I had when I was exercising? Wasn't it nice to walk up and down the stairs and not be winded? I could actually come home from work and still manage to stay awake until after K3 left for school... now it is all I can do to make it til she wakes up. I am tired all the time... whether I worked the night before or not... I want that energy level again.

What about the muscle tone I was getting? I could actually see results in my arms... my legs and yes, even my butt... I, who can't remember the last time she could actually feel muscles on her body... had some muscle definition going on. I want that again!

So what's it going to take on my part... I need to commit to exercising... no excuses this time... No depressions/plateaus/brick walls can stop my progress. Now that doesn't mean that I need to become an exercise fiend... but I do have to put out an honest effort if I expect to see results. I need to do the BodyRev on a regular basis... Ideally, legs and arms 3-4 times a week, abs 5 times a week and hopefully cardio 2 times a week. All this needs to be supplemented with walking... bike riding (if it ever gets warm here!) and other strength exercises as suggested by my sparkpeople plan.

I also need to continue to log my food intake ( I am not posting it regularly here anymore... too hard trying to capture the image... but it is being done on my sparks page). I am not going to worry about tying in my mood to the food but I do NEED to continue to log the food... everyday!

So let's see where this goes this time... I WANT to succeed... I think that I am worth fighting for... and if I don't fight for myself... no one will do it for me.

Fitness & Food Log 4/6

Yesterday wasn't a great day... the only thing that saved me since I ate a LOT of crap is that I seemed to have no appetite. Even in the morning when I made my Slimfast shake (which I actually love) I could only get half of it down. I ate no lunch because the kids and I went to the movies so while I put popcorn and soda (yes, I had soda) down for a snack it really was my lunch. For dinner we went for a fish fry but again I wasn't that hungry and only ate 1 piece and took most of the batter off because it was so greasy.

My intention was to get at least 15 minutes of BR in when we got home but J ate so much he wanted to walk it off so we went to Kohl's and Walmart and walked around. I really can't include that for exercise since it was more of a ramble thru the stores.

My water intake was also down yesterday. I think I only got about 40 oz in... with being sick lately, that should've been higher.

Today's another day and will try to do better... Here's the food log for yesterday...

BAck in the Fitness Mode again!!!

So who gets sick and on the recovery side decides... now is a good time to start working out, eating right and logging it(!!!), drinking that water again... well, apparently I do. Not sure what happened...maybe what I had was a virus that affected my brain. So what happened? A combination of things actually...

After not having eaten for 4 hours, I knew... I KNEW... I shouldn't do it... but I did anyway... I stepped on the scale. Now I really hit a plateau in February which thru me into some sort of downward spiral (hmmm, not very nautical... don't think Alden would like that analogy but oh well!) For most of March, I found that I could just not work out... couldn't work up the energy and more importantly the motivation to do it. Then towards mid-late March, Janet, gave me some good tips to try... go back slow... do something I liked. I took her advice and started up Abs again only this time I switched to Essential Abs plus, I got back into walking.

That's been working okay...but I knew it wasn't enough to give me any results. My little "spiral" cost me 10 lbs! With what I was now doing, I worked my way down 3 lbs. However, now after having been sick, when I stepped on the scale I found that I was now back to my lowest "loss" point. I knew I had to take advantage of this.

Then while I was sick, Janet also encouraged me to try posting under Alden's RevReport. I was not spending much time on the computer but I did go over and post what I did for last week. I also posted about how sick I was... thus giving me the perfect excuse for having a sucky report next week. It wasn't til Wednesday night that I went back to read some of the posts that I noticed one by Mary Jo and she mentioned a website that she uses... www.sparkpeople.com. I checked it out and decided to give it a try.

So today was my first day of it... normally, I would've used the excuse of still being too weak to exercise but I wouldn't let myself do it this time. It was only 35 degrees here but the skies were a pretty blue and the sun was shining so I went off for a walk joined by K2. My lungs were burning and I wasn't walking as hard as I normally do but I went 45 minutes. I also logged everything I ate today... which is the cool thing at the site because it lets you choose type, style, portion, etc... then gives you calories, and the rest of the nutritional breakdown. I did good today but my appetite is, of course, not back to normal. It will be interesting to see how I do when it is.

So I had a great day today! I am starting to feel better... I got a some exercise in... I ate good and logged it!! And I even sneaked in a Chai from Starbucks and found it didn't push me over my caloric limit... not bad!

***

Here is my logging from April 5...

So it's been awhile...

I really don't know what happened but I haven't been around for awhile. My food/mood logging went straight into the toilet along with my Revving. I think it was a combination of things that just made me hit the wall. The frustration of working so hard but being stuck at 30 lbs for so long. There are those that tell me I should be happy with the 3o that I have lost but when you feel like you are putting in the effort and not getting any visible gains (or in this case losses), it is so frustrating!

Then there is also what J says is the biggest factor... the weather. Winter started off so nice this year. Mild temperatures thru December and most of January. Then we got hit with the BIG CHILL and subzero temps. And then came the snow... it seemed like we couldn't go more than a few days without having to pull out the shovels. Now we are halfway into March and finally... FINALLY... can I hear an AMEN? ... getting some decent warm temps. Today it is supposed to hit the mid 60's. I just love seeing the sun... it feels like it has been too long!

So last week I missed my first Rev Report in quite awhile. Boy! Did I hear about it!! People that I didn't know would even care, emailed me to ask if I was okay and that my posts were missed. Well, let me just say that was quite an eye opener. I have to admit that I do my posts strictly for myself. Someone has commented on how honest they are...but what's the point in lying about what exercising you are doing? It's not gonna help me in the long run and the worst case scenario... meeting at a Suz event and still looking the same if not heavier. So nope... no lying for me on my posts. But having said that, I really don't think that anyone cares what I have to say and in fact, I sometimes wonder if people are complaining about having to hear another story about my kids or telling me to quit whining/bragging/etc. But judging from some of the emails I got this week, I was flabbergasted to think that there are those who actually enjoy reading my posts. And just the fact that they took the time to send me an email asking me if I was okay and if I needed help in any way, really just made me feel good.

So... the sun is shining, friends are cheering me on... there should be no problem with starting back up, right? However, I still seemed stalled. But a friend gave me some great suggestions... first, I needed to get myself outside in these mild temps and sunshine, and get myself walking... simple enough, right? Just go outside and get a walk in. Then it was suggested that since I enjoyed the Abs portion so much (I have often described it as my Yoga), that I should focus on just that for a bit. Don't worry about legs... don't worry about the cardio... Just do the abs and try to relax and enjoy it again. But since I own the Essentials Abs DVD and haven't used it yet, I should switch to that hoping to alleviate some of the boredom that may have set in from doing the Essentials DVD over and over and over.

I am hoping that I am back on track... I am definitely not moving at full steam yet. BUT I have done 3 walks since Saturday and have done Essential Abs once... will try it again today. I am not sure if I am going back to the food/mood logging... even when I was faltering on the exercising, my food intake seemed to stay fairly consistent with what I had been doing. The only difference right now is that we have girl scout cookies in the house!!! I may do posts about eating in on occasion but I don't think I am going to keep up with the logging part of it. Right now with my fluctuating schedule, I don't always eat at normal times. And one day may be a shortened day while the next is a 24 hour day. Plus, with being tired from my schedule it is hard to find the food/mood connection. However, I may be moving to a daytime job and if that happens I may consider giving the logging another try. The one thing from the logging that I would like to keep up is the Good Things portion... not sure how I will do it though.

So thanks to those of you who checked in on me... it was greatly appreciated. I am lucky to have friends that I "talk" to everyday but hearing from those of you who I didn't know I had a connection with...just really helped bring me out of my funk. So... thank you!

Food/Mood Log - 25 FEB

Food:
Vanilla Slimfast shake w/skim
1 slice French Toast w/syrup
2 sm pieces of ched cheese
2 choc nougat slimfast bars
1 Tukey/Salami sandwich on whole wheat w/lettuce
1 bowl Beef Veg soup
Microwave popcorn (shared w/J)

Green Tea - 15 ounces
Skim Milk - 8 ounces

Water - 60 ounces

Exercise:
3 hours of shoveling ... HEAVY snow

Mood... Good day... pleasant attitude... exhausted at night but hey! I worked my butt off!!


Good Things:
1) Watching big fluffy white snowflakes fall
2) Exercise from satisfying hard physical labor w/my the whole familly
3) Not having to go into work on a Sunday night

Food/Mood Log - 23 FEB

Food:
Slimfast Shake w/skim & fresh banana added
Turkey sandwich on whole wheat w/cheese
Small movie popcorn w/butter
Bacon Cheeseburger
Fries
Oreo Cake

8 ounce Iced Tea sweet
16 ounces Vanilla Coke

50 ounces water

Exercise:
none... :(

Mood... Good day... nothing out of the ordinary for being tired. However, it was a long day... can't remember too much. I remember calm... relaxation... no agitation... and no strong desire for midday nap. However, tiredness really set in tonight. Long day been up since 5:00a.m. or it could be the Bacon Cheeseburger...

Good Things:
1)Eating movie theatre popcorn
2)Mailing 2 packages that should bring smiles
3)Mother-Daughter talk w/K3 about school, boys and life (her experiences and mine)

Food/Mood Log - 22 FEB

Food:
Turkey & Cheese Chipotle Sandwich
Lemon Raspberry Square (HEY! It's better than the Vanilla Bean Cheesecake that was calling my name!)
Salad w/carrots, tsp cheese, seed mix and low-fat dijon dressing
Spaghetti w/ whole wheat pasta... little sauce w/2 mini-meatballs
Corn
5 Hershey kisses (the bag is finally gone!)

12 ounce Black Iced Tea (sweet)
Venti Chai Latte w/skim

Water - 50 ounces (need to do better tomorrow!)

Exercise:
1 HR walk

Mood... good day... only 4 hours of sleep but seemed to do okay with it. Ate a nice relaxing lunch at B&N's cafe. However, 1 hour later while grocery shopping was getting tired... little sleep? the grocery shopping? or the sandwich?? But when I came home had no problem finding the energy to make dinner, do ALL dishes and some laundry.

Good Things:
1) Relaxing reading lunch at B&N
2) Book browsing and shopping
3) J buying me sugar snap peas

Food/Mood Log - 21 FEB

Food:
Vanilla Slimfast Shake w/skim
2 Fried eggs
2 WW Toast
Salami on whole wheat bread
2 Slimfast peanut nougat bars
1/2 Bnls Sknls Chicken Breast (palm sized)
Mashed potatoes
Peas
Slimfast Blueberry Muffin bar
Turkey sandwich on whole wheat
Veggie Crisp Chips (cheese flavored)
Grapes
10 Hershey kisses (edited... forgot to mention these earlier)

Skim Milk - 8 ounces
Green Tea - 8 ounces

Water - 90 ounces


Exercise:
Legs (3 wts)
Cardio (2 wts)
Arms (2 wts)
Abs (3 wts)

Mood... When I woke up this morning, I was extremely tired! But again, I only had 4 hours of sleep. But I finally had enough sense to eat a nice large breakfast with K3 and afterwards I was raring to go. Since I had an energy spike, I did legs and cardio but then was interrupted before I could get into arms. However, by early afternoon, the sluggishness was back and sleep was needed. After a 3 hour much needed nap, felt much sluggish at first but after a bit became more alert. Ate a slimfast bar for a little pick me up and to help carry me over to dinner. Seemed to help. I had energy to make dinner and do a couple loads of laundry. However, I was extremely tired at work tonight... was it the mashed potatoes?? Was it the turkey sandwich??? Or was it simply because it was 2:00 in the freakin' morning??? Ended up taking a 1/2 hour power nap at 3:30 on my last break.

Good Things:
1) Getting my brand new washing machine (it's HUGE!)
2) Getting a nap in the middle of the day.
3) Mashed potatoes and peas... don't ask me why I love eating these two things together... and I do mean together... I scoop up some potatoes and then get some peas to climb on board and then... yuummm!

An Addendum to Food/Mood Logs

There is a lady from the BB (Cranky Otter) who post 3 things that makes her happy each day. She just recommended this tactic on the BB this week to help keep your focus on the positive. The kids and I used to do this a few years ago. We had a composition notebook that we labeled our Happiness Journal. Each night before bed, we would list at least one thing that made us happy that day. I am going to have to dig that thing up. It was fun to do back then so I have decided to adopt this and add it to my Log each day. It should be interesting to see what makes me happy especially on those bad days.

Food/Mood Log - 20 FEB

Food:
Bowl of Cooked Wheat Cereal w/ 2% (wahhh! we ran out of skim and I had to resort to Jeff's)
Turkey Sandwich on whole wheat w/mayo and lettuce
Veggie chip crisps (cheese flavored)
10 kisses (coconut cream variety)
Chinese Pepper Chicken w/white rice
1 mini Crab rangoon
2 Rice Cakes (white cheddar flavored)
3 Madeline cookies (from Starbucks - 230 calories! Yikes!)

Coke - 12 ounces
Grande Non-fat Chai latte

Water - 70 ounces

Exercise:
Cardio (2 wts!!!)
Abs (3 wts!!!)

Mood... Good mood today... very tired this a.m. but only had about 4 hours of sleep. Worked out after lunch (cardio and abs)... feel energized! I bumped my wts up one each (Cardio is now at 2 wts and Abs is at 3)... I can honestly say that I sweat this time. That's nothing new during Cardio although it was more intense this time but I can't remember the last time that I sweat during Abs... normally it is complete relaxation for me... and it was this time too however, there was SWEAT as well. It felt good! Great, in fact. Maybe that is what my workouts needed lately was to be bumped up a bit... I have been at 2 wts for the 3 main routines since October so probably overdue.

3 Good Things...
1)Doing the nail polish "thing" with the girls... toes for me... fingers for them.
2)Talking to Laura on the phone - we had been missing each other for a couple of weeks and finally hooked up today.
3) Having it reach 40 degrees and sunny! Feels so good!

Whining and Revving...

So I posted on the BB today about my frustrations with the scale not moving very much lately... and in fact, it hasn't made it back down to my lowest weight loss level (I am still 2 pounds away from that). You will see my actual post in a day or two when I do post the week's Sitrep. I am just waiting for Alden's response before I post. But in my post I mention that while I am happy for those who are losing dress sizes, it is frustrating for me to be stuck in this limbo... a fellow BBer mentioned the word, plateau. For six weeks, my workout routines SUCKED! I barely did anything! And now for the past month, I have gotten my act together and have worked out regularly (okay last week wasn't so hot but the others were great). I feel like I am doing okay with the food intake and in fact, I have completely upped my water intake. So while it feels like I am doing things right or at least better, I don't have that proof that the scale is supposed to provide.

However, I got some serious advice, some gentle reminders and much needed butt kicking to remind me of my original motivations, the successes that I have had so far and the fact that I have not really begun to balloon back up despite my lackluster performance for 6 weeks. I am going to move my scale so it is not out in the open. Let's hope the "out of sight... out of mind" philosophy works! Then I need to make the commitment to keep on working out (don't let the tired excuses creep in)... I need to continue to do my logging, not necessarily so much on the mood part (although I will try to keep at it) but rather keep logging the food and beverage intake. I think this has helped me make some good decisions by blogging my logs so definitely need to keep at it. I need to keep at the water intake... that has led to some great and surprising results already. It can only be a good thing. And I need to remember why I started this in the first place... I didn't start off saying that I am only going to do this so I can lose 50, 80, 100 pounds... no, I wanted to be fit and healthier. I want to be around to watch my children grow up and to play with my grandchildren. I want to set a good example for my children that you don't have to accept being fat but that it will take work to stay fit and healthy. This is what I need to do... and when I forget any of this or let the frustrations side-track me, I know that there are a bunch of ladies and one very determined former SEAL who will be ready to kick my butt back into gear and remind me.

Food/Mood Log - 16 FEB --- a little late and incomplete...

Accccckkk! I started a draft from last Friday but never finished it... wasn't going to post it but decided to anyway...even though I don't have a complete food listing. Two reasons for posting... 1) the only reason all 4 routines were done is because Andrea from the BB did a shout-out challenging everyone to do either BootCamp (not ready for that yet!) or all 4 revolutions on BR Essentials. Thank you, ANDREA! and 2) this was the day of my Plasma donation and it went SUPER! I don't know if the weight loss figures into it but what I honestly believe is making it easier is my increased water intake. I need to do a separate post on this visit... it was awesome!

Food:
Bowl of cooked wheat cereal w/skim milk
4 itty bitty breadsticks*
2 pieces of cheddar cheese*
2 slim jims*
2 pink sugar wafer cookies*
2 Rice Cakes (white cheddar flavored)

The starred (*) snacks were what I consumed after donating plasma...

12 ounce can of Apple Juice*
80 ounces water

Exercise:
BR Essen dvd
Abs - 2 ts
Arms - 2 wts
Legs - 2wts
Cardio - 2wts

Mood...

I am Still Here...

Life interfered the last couple of days... nothing too traumatic and in fact, some good stuff (had a day too myself but will blog on that later.) I am still doing the Food/Mood logs but didn't take notes over the weekend so I am not going to post partial logs... I will just skip them and pick it up starting today. And no, it is not because I am embarrassed to admit what I ate...trust me, Saturday was not a good food day but it was a special occasion so I will not apologize for it. And if you really need to know, in one day I ate, cheese fries with a Coke (tasted soooo good!) and dinner was small steak and shrimp w/melted cheese on it and mashed potatoes with a chocolate brownie for dessert! So see... I am not hiding from it...just can't do a full post so why bother? But I am back!

Food/Mood Log - 15 FEB

Food:
Slimfast Shake w/skim
Small movie theatre popcorn
2 Tacos (WW soft shell, lettuce, cheese, grd beef)
apple walnut bar
10 Lorna Doone shortbread cookies

12 ounce Coke
8 ounces skim milk
10 ounces hot green tea

Water - 65 ounces

Exercise:
1 HR Walk


Mood... not a bad day... however food intake was just off yesterday. Slept only a few hours after coming home from work. Went to the movies in the afternoon (had popcorn and soda) felt sickish later... I think it was the greasy buttery popcorn on a mainly empty stomach (its happened before). Very tired afterwards (but this again could be because I only slept 3 hours). Have to admit though (whether it was lack of sleep or food choices), I had no energy last night. Didn't Rev at all...gave it a brief thought and just didn't. Need to change that for today and the weekend...

Food/Mood Log - 14 FEB

Food:
Slimfast shake w/ skim
2 pieces whole wheat toast
1 pineapple spear
Turkey sanwhich on WW roll w/lettuce, tomtato, mayo
small cup of baked potato soup
Salad w/carrots, cheese, seed mix and sugar snap pea pods (spray on red wine dressing)
2 rice cakes
2 cupcakes
10 pieces of laffy taffy
6 pieces of Hershey's treasures
10 Water Crackers w/ asiago cheese spread

Venti Chai Latte w/skim

80 ounces of water

Exercise:
BR Essen
Legs (2 wts)
Arms (2wts)
Abs (2 wts)


Mood... For the most part it was a good day... only lows were during a GS meeting (that was after eating the sandwich and soup) where I suffered some frustration but 2 of my girls are really irritating... so was it the food or the girls??? Later lost it with J but that was more due to disappointment about something rather than food, although my response was a bit overly sensitive. Work was good tonight... I was "on" all night... laughing, joking around... but became extremely tired at 4:00 a.m. right after second break where I ate the crackers and cheese... not too mention the 2 cupcakes 3 hours earlier (and, ummmm, the hershey's candy)... so was it the food? or was it the fact that it was 4 a.m.??? With my crazy overnight work schedule and only part-time at that... it is hard to determine if my mood swings are food related or from lack of sleep or non-consistent sleep patterns... I will try to keep an eye on it. It would be interesting to know.

Food/Mood Log - 13 FEB

Food:
Slimfast Shake (w/skim)
Pineapple spear
2 Rice Cakes white cheddar flavored
4 Dove milk chocolate pieces
Ravioli (chicken and asiago filled)w/roasted tomato white sauce
Green Beans
5 Lorna Doone Shortbread Cookies

8 0z skim milk
8 0z hot chocolate w/ Baileys

50 ounces water

Exercise:
1 HR Walk
1 HR snow shoveling

Mood is finally improving. Maybe I can finally start to watch how food affects mood now. Yesterday I had a difficult day in the late afternoon... CRAVING something sweet. I walked up and down the cookie/cracker aisle of the grocery store reading the nutrition labels.... wanting desperately something sweet. I finally settled on Lorna Doone shortbread cookies and some Water Crackers. The LD cookies were actually less in calories than the Healthy Choice and the sugar-free cookies that I looked at... what's up with that? I survived the grocery store without buying anything else fattening and escaped. I wasn't agitated or grumpy during this time but the CRAVING was so strong... it was like I NEEDED something sweet at that time. Last night I was pretty mellow... not overly tired or dragging. With having the pasta for dinner, I thought maybe that would have some effect but I didn't really notice any. Will keep watch in the future since pasta is a fairly regular occurence here.

Food/Mood Log - 12 FEB

Food:
2 pieces Supreme style pizza
Slice Marble Loaf (Starbucks but shared with dd)
Turkey Sandwich (WW toast, 1 tsp mayo, lettuce)
Bowl of Black Bean soup (tomato based)
3 milk chocolate Dove candies
Salad ( lettuce, carrots, 1 tsp cheese, sugar snap peas, seed mix, spray on red wine mist dressing)
100 Calorie pack of fudge striped cookies
Veggie Chips
4 bite size 3 muskateers

Grande Chai (w/skim)

Water - 90 ounces

Exercise:
1 HR walk


Mood... day continued on being a lousy day... need to take care of problems at home, I think, before things can improve... Today one of those will be semi-taken care of (for the time being anyway) and hopefully I can move on... Mail call in the afternoon was a help... to know that there are friends (some that I haven't even met physically yet) out there thinking about me... It's a good feeling. Evening was a bit iffy... but I tried to think positive and put my best face forward. Work... started off iffy... my mood didn't help...but things went rather smoothly... my boss actually listened to my idea...it worked and set me off flying... When I left this morning he asked me... "so what's up tonight... you were FLYING... I was so excited to see it." It was nice to be noticed for hard work... it usually isn't in that place. So I really can't see if the food affects the mood these last couple of days due to situations but I am hoping to continue this to see if Alden is correct on it... The man is smart and seems to know what he is talking about so I would tend to agree with him. Maybe I will ask him about it at next "REEEPORT!"

In one way I am proud of myself... there was a time, early in the afternoon, when I wanted to drowned myself in FOOD... something sinful and fattening and sugary sweet... I didn't care... I CRAVED it... but I knew that it was my emotional self trying to find a fix and I refused to cave... I did have the couple pieces of Dove but hey... it wasn't the bag! Which is really what I wanted... I seemed to know that my body/mind was trying to use food as a quick fix to feeling better.

Food/Mood Log - 11 FEB

Food:
Vanilla Slimfast shake (w/skim)
1 fried egg
1 whole what toast
1 pineapple spear
10 crackers w/asiago cheese spread
1 slice pork roast
1 helping mashed red potatoes
peas
salad (w/carrots, 1 tsp cheese, sugar snap peas, seed mix)
1 pkg "100 Calorie fudge striped cookies)
tortilla chips w/chicken dip

skim milk - 8 ounces
Water - 80 ounces

Exercise:
BR Essen
Cardio (1 wt)
Abs (2 wts)


First, let me preface this by saying that yesterday was a full work day, so I was up 24 hours and the food intake reflects that. As for the mood part, awful, horrible day... bad mood... emotions up and down, mostly down... but I know it is not food related... it was (and is) purely situational.... won't write about it... but I am in hibernation mode right now (friends, just give me a day or so, please, to respond to emails)...let's just leave it at... I HATE winter and all the stuff necessary because of it.... apparently, 2 hours is not enough sleep... I am going back to bed...